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                        太原
                         歡迎訪問德育新時空!
                        董卿首談兒子:你想讓孩子成為什么樣的人,很簡單~
                        2019年06月16日 14:54來源:網絡轉載 閱讀量: 277

                        這一次打動我的,不是《詩詞大會》和《朗讀者》里那個妙語如珠的主持人,而是出現在央視4.24日的《面對面》里,首談初為人母的經歷的董卿。 

                        一襲淺藍襯衫,一抹淡淡溫柔,是那種做了母親的女人才有的溫柔。 

                        2015年7月,董卿結束訪問學者的身份從美國回到央視,復出的她多了一個身份——母親。

                        01 

                        “你為什么做母親?” 

                        王寧問她:“為何在這個時侯做了母親?” 

                        董卿接受《面對面》專訪視頻 

                        她說,人到了一定年齡,很多事情不能再拖了,不然就永遠失去這個機會了,人對“永遠”這個詞是有敬畏的。這個40歲的女人,在擁有了事業、愛情后,渴望做一名母親,一切都剛剛好。 

                        02 

                        我的世界里不能只有孩子, 

                        孩子的世界里也不能只有我! 

                        初為人母,她所有的時間被孩子占據,人也變得瑣碎與平庸,孩子的完全依賴,讓她有點千頭萬緒的忙亂,但是,董卿從來沒想過要做一個全職媽媽,即便她的家庭有這個條件。 

                        她說,有了孩子后,很多事情需要平衡,并不是我的世界里只有孩子,孩子的世界里只有我。最好的狀態,就是我們在彼此的世界里,相互平衡。 

                        真的很贊同這個觀點,在彼此的世界里平衡,其實就是說父母要跟孩子保持界限感,不要過分介入孩子的游戲、生活。但是,中國的父母向來缺乏“界限感”,這也是親子矛盾、婆媳矛盾最主要的誘因。 

                        03 

                        你想要孩子成為什么樣的人, 

                        你自己先去做個什么樣的人! 

                        關于孩子的教育問題,董卿很欣賞朋友說過的一句話:你想要孩子成為什么樣的人,很簡單,你自己先去做一個這樣的人。換句話說,你自己是個什么樣的人,你的孩子就會成為什么樣的人。 

                        如果父母有自己的事業、愛好,是個積極樂觀、寬容大度的人,那么當孩子慢慢長大,就會對父母滿懷愛與尊敬,就會耳濡目染地學習到父母身上那些好的品質。 

                        所以,董卿才說:“我不想放棄不斷自我成長的可能,我不能因為生了孩子就讓自己止步不前。” 

                        04 

                        父母的一言一行, 

                        在不知不覺中,影響孩子一生。 

                        2017年董卿紅透熒屏,是必然的。 

                        主持的花瓶太多,靠胸靠臉只能紅一時,注定不會永遠,唯有她像翠竹一樣屹立在舞臺中央,帶有飽滿的思想與情緒,還有睿智的思維與經歷。 

                        有人說這一切緣于她有一對畢業于復旦大學的父母和年少時所受的教育。 

                        的確,原生家庭成就了她的基礎,而努力卻是她成功的底氣。 

                        現在,她又堅持把這些優秀的品質傳給自己的孩子。 

                        因為,她知道母親的意義,但仍有很多女人在做了母親后依然不懂什么是責任? 

                        我曾在一輛公交車上,看到一位母親和兒子爭奪手機時聲嘶力竭地嚷:“你就知道上網打游戲,成績考得那么差,還要不要臉?” 

                        七、八歲的男孩反擊她:“你憑什么說我?你不也天天上網聊天,刷淘寶,我們家的錢都被你花光了。” 

                        “我是大人,你能和我比?”她有點氣急敗壞。 

                        “大人怎么了?大人就不要學習嗎?” 

                        的確,很多女人在做了母親后都止步不前了,放棄自我又甘于平庸!這位母親一個勁的在孩子身上抓毛病,卻不知母親的行為對孩子潛移默化的影響。這樣的母親,孩子又怎么能夠喜歡、尊重、以她為榮! 

                        龍應臺說過,孩子小的時侯,父母對他們來說是萬能的,是完全可以依靠的,這就是父母對孩子教育的黃金時期,等父母一到了青少年時期,父母的“有效期限”就快到了。 

                        因為該說的,該教的,該做的,都應該早做足了,是驗收的時侯了,這驗收父母的教育方針,也是孩子對外界的應變能力。“過期”后的父母再怎么努力,也比不過10年前來得有效了。 

                        有些母親抱怨為了孩子放棄工作與自我,每天圍著他轉,甚至連婚姻的不幸福,婆媳不和也歸于孩子。 

                        卻不知一位好母親抵上一百個教師,好的榜樣是一種力量,影響著孩子,甚至一生。 

                        05 

                        她說, 

                        其實陪孩子成長時我也在成長。 

                        聰明的女人都會像董卿一樣,在結婚生子后,以孩子為動力,不斷努力成為一個全新的美好的媽媽。這樣的成長,才能讓人生變得豐盛,讓孩子變得更好。 

                        好媽媽一定可以滋養孩子,用身體,用靈魂。 

                        就像作家阿瑟,克拉克的墓志銘:“我永遠都沒有長大,但我永遠都沒有停止生長。” 

                        這樣的女人,才不會弄丟自已的靈魂和孩子的未來! 

                        在養育孩子的路上,我們一路前行,直到遇見更好的自己。 

                        是的,人的一生都不能放棄成長!也許不是人人都能成為董卿,但我們卻可以成為最好的自己,成為孩子最好的媽媽,給孩子更好的指引。 

                        你希望你的孩子成長為什么樣的人?請你先去做一個什么樣的人!

                        [出處:云生涯]

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