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                        太原
                         歡迎訪問德育新時空!
                        責備孩子時不妨加點糖
                        2017年02月10日 12:49來源:網絡轉載閱讀量: 37
                          有人說,孩子是天生的創造者,也是天生的破壞者。這話一點兒也不假。

                          有一天,一下班,桐桐就乖乖地給我準備好了拖鞋,還將我的文件包接過去,給我放好。我心想不知道這小丫頭腦子里在搞什么鬼,露出了微笑。

                          見我露出笑容,桐桐才小聲地對我說:“爸爸,咱家的小魚好像撐著了,肚子都脹了。”說完,就低下了頭。

                          我去魚缸那邊看,發現里面的金魚都翻肚皮了,魚缸里的水變得又白又稠,魚缸邊還有幾個牛奶盒子。我知道是怎么回事了,桐桐肯定是將牛奶倒進魚缸,導致這些魚全部“遇難”。

                          說實話,當時我很生氣,笑容也被我收起來了,嚇得桐桐直往沙發角落里躲。

                          這時候妻子正好回來,桐桐跑到妻子懷里,說:“媽媽,你不是說牛奶有營養,我喝了可以長高嗎?我就是想讓小魚長得快些。”

                          我這才知道桐桐是這樣想的,立即就原諒了她。但是,我必須讓她知道她的行為是錯誤的。

                          我對桐桐說:“桐桐,你真有想象力,為了讓金魚長得快,你都舍得將自己喜歡喝的牛奶給金魚喝。爸爸要表揚你。可是,你之前都不知道金魚是不是愛喝牛奶,就自作主張給金魚喂牛奶。看,這些金魚都死了,多可惜,你說呢?”

                          桐桐對我說:“爸爸,我錯了。”我摸了摸桐桐的頭,給桐桐講了為什么金魚不能喝牛奶。

                          讓孩子認識錯誤,不必非要吹胡子、瞪眼睛,不發脾氣,不動肝火,給責備裹上一層“糖”,讓孩子先嘗到甜頭,然后再指出孩子的錯誤,這樣孩子更容易接受,親子關系也更和諧。

                          有一次,吃飯的時候,桐桐光顧看電視了,沒有注意碗在餐桌邊上,不小心把碗蹭落在地上摔壞了。

                          如果這時我對桐桐說:“吃飯的時候不能看電視,我都和你說多少次了,怎么還是記不住啊?”桐桐肯定會更聽不進去我的話。

                          我對桐桐說:“是爸爸不好,沒有幫你看好碗,它怎么滑到桌子底下了啊?我以后不幫你看了,你自己要對它負責。”

                          我說完這話,桐桐很不好意思。但是,桐桐的心里畢竟也得到了安慰,之后每次吃飯的時候,桐桐都會很專心,就算電視上的節目再好,她也會關掉電視再吃飯。

                          還有一次,我也是用同樣的方法:

                          家里來了位客人,桐桐最開始還像個小主人似的給客人端茶倒水,我還很高興,客人也夸桐桐懂事。

                          可是,我和客人在客廳說話,桐桐一會兒插話,一會兒在沙發上蹦過來蹦過去,讓我和客人都沒法交談。

                          “桐桐,你去書房畫畫吧!”我用嚴厲的眼神看著桐桐說。

                          “不去,我要給叔叔跳個舞。”說完,就在我們面前跳起了舞。客人很尷尬地對我笑笑,我也覺得過意不去。

                          “桐桐,你看,叔叔對你的印象很好,你是個聽話的孩子,給叔叔端水,還跳舞逗叔叔開心。可是,叔叔和爸爸有事情要談,你在這里,我們都沒法談了。要不這樣,叔叔以前對我說很想看你畫的畫,你去給叔叔畫幅畫吧!”

                          我的語氣是和緩的,但是相信桐桐能聽出我的責備,她在這里,確實影響了我們的交談。聽完我的話,她乖乖地去書房了,直到那位客人走,桐桐都沒有再出來。

                          如果我直接責備桐桐,說不定桐桐會更加“人來瘋”,那樣我沒面子,桐桐更沒面子,弄不好還會傷害桐桐小小的自尊心,但是我先夸她,再責備她,她就樂意接受了。

                          家是孩子溫馨的港灣,但是如果父母的教育方式不得當,也會使家成為傷人的地方,尤其是對孩子心靈的傷害。這種傷害,一般都是出自父母的無意識,卻讓孩子覺得難以接受,并且會直接影響到孩子的情緒,甚至孩子的成長。

                          責備孩子時,你要先將心里即刻想到的惡狠狠的話吞進肚里,給責備裹上一層薄薄的“糖衣”,然后再說給孩子聽。你會發現,孩子可能會因此變得越來越符合你的心意了,變得越來越優秀。

                        技術支持:太原市海匯通網絡科技有限公司  聯系電話:0351-2367909  監督電話:13835135938

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