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                        太原
                         歡迎訪問德育新時空!
                        學習 請把孩子“掛”起來
                        2019年06月21日 16:51來源:網絡轉載 閱讀量: 133

                        幾乎所有的專家名人都會告訴你,學習不是最重要的,而是全面發展,是身心健康。道理大家都贊同,但是對于絕大多數家長,最現實的,或者說最重視的,都回到了學習。

                        我非常理解,學習是顯性的,馬上可以看到,關鍵是大家都這樣評價孩子,還涉及臉面問題。而成長是隱性的,是階段結果,任何人都很難在顯性的結果面前淡定,我們就先談學習吧。

                        寫下這個題目,我就知道沒有任何人有靈丹妙藥,或者說標準答案,我只能分享一些經驗供大家參考。

                        首先需要有正確的認知。國家主席只有一個,省長只有一個,兩院院士也僅僅1000多人。2017年高考報名940萬人,招生735萬人,清華北大每年招收的學生總數也只有7000余人,10萬分之一。每一個人都先需要有一個清醒的認識,對自己有一個恰當的定位與期盼,實際上絕大多數孩子成不了“牛孩”的。但是,每一個人都可以達到自己的最高度,如果這樣看,當然是有辦法的。

                        其中最有效的一個辦法,就是啟動孩子的“發動機”,把他“掛”起來。 

                        什么意思?曾經有名師總結經驗說,優秀是一種習慣!這句話說的比較到位,讓孩子一開始就習慣于優秀,讓他無法容忍自己的不優秀很重要。 

                        我們回顧一下自己的成長過程,就會發現,經常會有一門或者幾門功課比較厲害,老師同學也都會說你在這方面有天賦。但仔細想想,無非是我們因緣巧合,或是因為提前學過,或是偏巧知道了,讓老師同學驚艷,贊嘆,自己虛榮心也得到了前所未有的滿足,于是你就不自覺地在這個學科上花了很多時間,因為你希望一直保持這種優秀,也怕辜負老師同學的贊嘆,于是就產生了無窮的動力,于是就變成了興趣,愛好,甚至是天賦。

                        說穿了,實際是自己在這方面得到了大家的認可,虛榮心得到了極大的滿足而已。久而久之,你自己都相信自己的確有這方面天賦,感覺自己沒有花多少時間,但實際上,你一定比別人花的多,用心琢磨的多,只是沒有察覺而已。更重要的是,時間一長,你習慣于這種崇拜,這種天賦,你都很難容忍自己不夠優秀,你就會在這條路上狂奔,開掛了。

                        正因為此,你可以在一開始,有意識地給孩子多做一點準備。這需要根據孩子的特性特質,選擇不同的領域,一般情況下,我尤其贊同在語言文學方面早學,多發展一些。 

                        在小學階段,語文英語數學這三科中,數學一旦開竅,容易上來,但語文英語不同,這是一個需要積累的學科,需要一些死功夫,需要大量閱讀基礎,不是短期可以提高的。但語文與英語往往容易獲得更多表現機會。為什么不在孩子很小,還沒有較大的學習負擔之前讓他每天學習背誦一些知識,既是傳統文化的熏陶,也是提前的準備與鋪墊。處理巧妙一些,這些東西絕不會成為負擔,而是讓孩子有無窮的樂趣與斗志。想提醒一點,你不必在意孩子是否真的懂了,背下來,必有噴涌的一天,就是古人所說的“熟讀唐詩三百首”的道理。

                        等到開始孩子需要大量去學習,去背誦,感受到負擔的時候,這已經成為他的興趣與愛好,家長就不用天天敦促操心了,孩子的感受也早已發生了巨大變化,變被動為主動了。

                        記得我兒子當初回國,中文已經說不利落了,萬般無奈之下,我采取了簡單的激勵辦法:讀一頁中文書給1塊錢。孩子就選了白話歷史,或者字大行稀的唐詩宋詞,尤其是宋詞。久而久之,他在中文上的水平得到了很大的提高,尤其喜歡填詞。在初三緊張的復習備考期間,他最喜歡的解壓方式之一就是填首詞。

                        有一點小竅門給大家,很多人都在教孩子三字經,唐詩宋詞,你完全可以考慮讓他背四書五經,這樣就區別于人了。同時,扎實的文言文訓練,會讓孩子在思考與行文上與別人有明顯區別。一旦有機會,他可能會讓老師、同學驚艷,也就奠定了他最基本的開始,把他“開掛”了。

                        想提醒的是,家長一定要注意孩子的特點,特性與興趣,千萬不要做過了,弄巧成拙,讓孩子一開始就覺得是負擔,甚至逆反,那就適得其反了。 

                        更想提醒的是,不是每一個人都適合走學習這條路的,不是每一個人都可以成為學霸的。這個伎倆,或者說辦法,本質是如何撬動孩子的發動機與自信,讓他自信并不斷開掛前行,相信還有很多種辦法,不只是學習去體現。

                        最后,我還想說,孩子是父母的鏡子,有遺傳,還有教養,他的學習習慣的好壞,學習成績的好壞,在某種程度上是家長決定的。你是否努力?你是否學習工作做得很好?一個努力的父母,不大可能有不努力的子女,你的言傳身教是他最好的榜樣與保障,而不是學校、老師。

                        [出處:中國教育在線]

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